Mun,

It's great that you're branching out and everything, it is, but don't you think this is a little spur-of-the-moment? You haven't seen half of the episodes in years, remember?

And as for this username... Very funny. Really.

I don't want to be homeless forever, but take your time. I know you're busy, what with school and all.

Cross is being an arrogant arse as usual, continuously traversing on his journey of laying with woman and drowning me in debt (He asked for a boat! Who the in the bloody hell asks for a boat out of the blue!),

while on top of that Link is hovering over me with mountain stacks of paper work, glimmering those "Let's work our arses off" eyes at me.

And JerKanda just had to make my day even better by sprinkling his idiotic ravings at me.

So far, it's been a typical day.

I didn't mean to rant at you, truly I didn't, but somehow... you are surprisingly enjoying all this. Please don't put on that unknowing face of yours. You know what I mean. I heard you! I heard you chuckling evilly behind my back!

Are you perhaps enjoying my suffering? Does everyone enjoy my being burdened?

I've even heard of people writing Angst!Allen fanfiction about me. Why is it so popular? Is sadism becoming a contagious disease?

Please don't catch that disease, Miss Mundane. I have enough sadists in my life.

So you made a journal for me finally. Great. Now I'm sharing space with Hee-Haw over there and listening to all his Keith stories because the kid doesn't know when or how to shut up. Best of all, you don't even know where you're going to use me or if you'll get a handle on my character.

Good going, mun.

I got an idea though, send me some place away from hillbillies. A man can only handle so much...

Cool, mun! You got me a journal. But do you really think anyone's going to get the joke in my username?

Let's find a game, mun. I can do the world more by being out there, and not in your headspace!

Why should I bother with your problems? As long as they don't influence what you do to Zima or me, I don't care.

Do what you want. That "4th wall" event coming up here should keep you busy long enough so that you don't have to talk to me about things I'm not interested in.

Dear Shithead Mun,

Let's get some things straight from the start here. I still hate you. You've been getting me into all sorts of crazy shit and, if I could I'd punch you in the face. The painting incident was ridiculous, and the whole... pervert watch thing... that was ENTIRELY your fault. I'd have NEVER ended up on that list if you hadn't gone after the Colonel first. It was not this 'karma' thing you kept going on about. It was YOUR doing and nothing else.

However. Al still hasn't arrived, and now Winry's gone... I KNOW you can do something about this. SO FIX THIS. FIND THEM.

Sincerely,
Ed

PS. Go make more icons of me. You know you want to.

Dear mun,

I can't believe you such a heartless person, even a liar. You've broke your promise! You set me up cleaning the whole ship alone for a week, while you're having fun on your 'hiatus'. Promise me for the next two days, you got to find more crew mates... and no excuses!

I heard there's a dog couldn't make his way to the town? Stop making fun already!

Mun,

I am transmitting this message to you from a remote, undisclosed location so that you may transmit this message from your fingers to the keyboard to a special plane of existence where all the world may freely read it.

I require a home with a nice dance studio and a lack of animal (or human) cruelty. If you may take notes of places with good vibes and pass the vibes along to me I will make my decision.

-Lyn Cassady

Go to bed, you silly girl. Staying up so late, regardless of cause, is not going to help your chronic fatigue. Moreover, your efforts here are no excuse to shirk your schoolwork.

Perhaps it's the stress of your work beginning to snowball, or, perhaps, it is the aforementioned fatigue, but I've noticed you're in a rut. And I know you've noticed it as well; your finals will take your time for these next three weeks, so pay no attention to me while you complete those. I will be here when you return, as will everyone else here in your headspace. Believe me.

I'm glad I can make this post. I'm glad for this journal entry. I am posting this on the internet. The reason for this post is to talk to my mun.

I want to talk to him because I am angry. I am not happy at all. The reason I am feeling so much anger is that I cannot leave your head. That makes me very angry indeed.

... So you've finally decided to stop ignoring me. How kind of you.

For the record, I didn't enjoy being a child the first time around. I don't see why you're so keen to have me repeat the experience.

- B Ryuzaki

Now, listen here, miss!

You promised me an argument and I want it now!

...Please?

You're letting me speak? To you?

How flattering. I wasn't even supposed to exist. I appreciate the space you made to accompany me, though--you managed to insert a character within a character without even giving the former a name. I'm floored.

And yes. I realize what I did. It was highly irresponsible of me. I'm very highly irresponsible; you'll have to forgive me that. But you know, when you first conceived me, I was meant to make an utter mess of things. I'm only doing my job.

A little too well, you say? Nonsense!

Regardless, dear Mundane, you ultimately have the last word. What are we but puppets to you, hm hm...

To end this message: you are particularly gifted for being able to manage this in the first place. But I do hold you completely responsible for whatever happens next. Despite how real I might seem to you, I am not. I am merely fictional. You say your creativity takes place in the subconscious, but the subconscious is yours.

Good luck in all your future endeavors--but I haven't left the game quite yet.

Really the first time in years that you want to really write something that isn't just for rp purposes and it just has to be a "fanfic" involving me. I suppose I should be flattered to some degree.

And if you're really serious about this finding me a home thing, could you make sure that I'm not the only turk, surrounded by avalanche members who probably wouldn't be happy to see me? In fact I'd really like to hang out with Reno, Rude, Tseng and everyone else if that's possible. I miss them, they were like family to me in a messed up kinda way. Stop reading into this request more than necessary, dammit! I see you making those googly eyes at me. It is not because of that!

Stupid Ape,


...You have got to be kidding.


No love,
The Doctor

Oh really, now. Must we?

It will just lead to a broken promise if he does agree. Which I highly, highly doubt he ever would. And we've already established I feel like a burden to him, and voicing my true opinion on much of anything would exacerbate the problem at hand.

I'm as much of a guest in his house as my nephew, and eighty years apart can change a mans priorities. Yes it hit a nerve with me but I'd best not be kicked out because you lack brakes.

Ahh, but that amuses you so I suppose to you, squabbling with my brother is perfectly fine. If this ends painfully for me and causes a rift between us, I'll be sour with you for a good long while.

He's my everything, though I can't expect you to understand.

- Izuna

ps: Do stop asking me if it's worth it. Yes, of course. I had to set my foot down at some point, a man just doesn't bring that sort of thing home. That's best left where it belongs: elsewhere.

M-Mun-san, why are you... Shouldn't you be going to slee--

[Pause.]

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Z-Zombies?!


[Flail. Huddles in a corner, covering her ears.]

I didn't see that - I didn't see that - I didn't see that --

Oi mun, what is this? One entry in and you're already feeling unconfident? Shape up! If you couldn't play me, the app would have been rejected!

While your at it, get me some better icons, won't you? Homework load is no excuse to put it off.

Just give it up. You don't have the confidence to play me seriously and there ain't no way in hell I'm gonna let you put me in some of these places you're considering.

Especially ones that don't have Mega Man in them! Or did you forget that important little detail? And don't go thinking that I'd attract one, cause you saying that sounds really effin' creepy as shit. And I've listened to the old bastard talk, so that says something about you.

So quit it or I'll start using you for target practice. Or maybe feed you to Gospel, he'd have fun with you mun.

Mundane.

Review my canon.

You have the time now that your precious real life events have quieted for the time being.

Find master Integra. This freakish community you've dropped me into is pulling on what remains of my sanity in ways I never thought possible, not to mention certain upcoming events will pose awkward without her.

And mun...

...A rundown theater?

Listen mun, I don't think you really know what you're getting yourself into. You and I both know that you don't have the time for this, and I'm not interested in getting into another mess.

...You're starting to sound like my brother, mun. Maybe you should think about playing him somewhere, and just leave me be.

[He sighs, and he knows he's fighting a losing battle here.]

Alright, alright! Look- if you think you can do this even with your schedule, fine. But don't say I didn't warn you.

Of all the things you've ever done, this is the absolute worst. A 'canon update'? There was nothing wrong with where I was before! Now I'm going to be stuck there forever without Master Kunzite!

I've already accepted he isn't coming. I don't want him stuck in this filthy place - and don't you dare try to coax someone into taking him here. Or bring that wretch Jadeite along with them! Or the Queen - I don't want or need any of them. Nephrite is enough to handle.

And renew this stupid account.

If you think I'm going anywhere near the Winchester boys, you're crazier than they are. I learned my lesson the - what was it? The third time around?

Yeah, I'll pass.